Hope & Hopelessness Read online

  CONTENTS

  1. The Answer

  2. One Bennet on the Side of America and the Rest on the English

  3. Home Sweet Home

  4. The Evolution of Mr. Darcy's Character

  5. There is a Thin Line Between Foreshadow & Predictions

  6. When Duty Calls Before Desire

  7. A Tale Told by an Idiot

  8. Captain Wentworth

  9. Alarming News

  10. Poor Charlotte!

  11. Looking to the Unknown

  12. Well Worth the Fight

  13. Time Heals all Wounds

  14. A Certain Look

  15. The Crofts

  16. A History Behind the Heartbreak

  17. No More Rain

  18. Lyme

  19. The Tongues of the Ton

  20. Walking Both Away & Towards a Problem

  21. Such is the Way of Resentment

  22. More Unfolding of Heroes

  23. What is to Be Done?

  24. Two Actors

  25. Sitting Alone

  26. If the World is a Stage

  27. It's Always Sunny in a Ballroom

  28. Wild & Free

  29. Calm Waters

  30. A Whirlwind at Cumberland

  31. Saved by Foolishness

  32. A Confession

  Thank You For Reading

  About the Author

  Also by Ney Mitch

  HOPE & HOPELESSNESS

  Copyright © 2022 by Ney Mitch

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  ISBN: 979-8-88653-068-1

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  Published by Satin Romance

  An Imprint of Melange Books, LLC

  White Bear Lake, MN 55110

  www.satinromance.com

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  Smashwords Edition

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  Names, characters, and incidents depicted in this book are products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental and beyond the intent of the author or the publisher. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review or scholarly journal.

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  Published in the United States of America.

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  Cover Design by Caroline Andrus

  Hello all. As it often is my custom, the last book was left on quite the cliffhanger, and I hope the response will be to your satisfaction.

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  Once again, I am very thankful for those who made this book release possible and helped all my dreams come true. And no one will ever tell me that it is not about the reader. On the contrary, when it comes to the dedication, it will always be about you all, and how splendid you are for continuing.

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  Now you shall find out Georgiana’s answer to Jason Whitfield. We begin this tale with her response.

  1

  THE ANSWER

  It is a hidden feeling, generally experienced by the recipient of whomever undergoes it, that when asking a question and not receiving an answer, one begins to worry—to fear.

  And therefore, as Georgiana stood there, looking on Jason Whitfield after he just asked for her hand in marriage, every moment she did not respond stung.

  The lot of us stood there in wonderment. It was certain that we knew Georgiana adored Jason, however it counted for little if she did not respond in the affirmative.

  Looking around at the rest of those in our party, I only wondered at their internal thoughts and considerations.

  I knew that Kitty would be wondering at Georgiana's hesitancy.

  Colonel Fitzwilliam and my husband would be angry that Jason had proposed without getting their consent, for they were her legal guardians.

  Henry and Lydia would look on it in curiosity and little more. Henry had very publicly spoken of his proposal to Jane; thus, he was no stranger to not-so-private matters when it came to an engagement.

  Jane would be apprehensive as well at Jason's very public proposal, and very well could have been remembering her own past experiences.

  And I...well, to be in earnest, I did not know what to feel.

  Yet, at last, the silence broke, and Georgiana smiled.

  “Of course, Jason. I love you without reserve, and I consent to being your wife.”

  “You do?” he asked eagerly.

  “Yes, of course I do,” she said with a smile. “Oh Jason, I have been resolved to being bound to you for so long now, how could you have ever doubted it?”

  “I just... I cannot believe I found you!” He turned to Darcy and Colonel Fitzwilliam, his expression resolute. “I do not ask for your forgiveness, future brother and cousin, for it is not your happiness that I consider in this case.”

  Jason closed the space between him and Georgiana and kissed her passionately.

  “Oh, dear lord, I am going to be sick,” Mr. Darcy moaned under his breath.

  “Fitzwilliam,” I hissed, “be quiet.”

  “She's my little sister. Have you not the slightest idea how repulsive this is to me?”

  “And I said quiet yourself. Do not make me count to three.”

  “You wouldn't...”

  “One. Two. Three.”

  “Oh, very well.”

  All became quiet as we all left them alone in the yard and entered the house. It was prohibited to give them any privacy, yet the rules felt as if they were of little consequence and while the rest went to the sitting room, Darcy and I watched the newly engaged couple from the glass of the windows.

  “I suppose I should be happy,” Darcy said with a sigh.

  “Of course, you should be,” I replied archly. “Are you not?”

  “I cannot be truly. You know what I have confessed. A part of me did deeply desire to have her just be with us at Pemberley for the rest of our days, with nothing changing—you know I hate change—even though it be a natural thing.”

  “No one likes change, even if it is for the better sometimes. It is in our nature to easily allow ourselves to get stuck in our ways.”

  He nodded. “And I do. It should have been us at Pemberley, along with Jane teaching students in our east wing, and Georgiana looking after the tenants and our sons having two of their aunts under the same roof as their mother. Three mothers they could have had, and who would want more?”

  The mention of our twins brought an ache to my heart. How I missed them! And how easy I thought it would be to leave them. I was a fool. “You wanted our sons to be spoiled?”

  “I wanted them to never feel as if they are alone. And I always have and always will want family near me—as long as it is the good kind. However, every time a sister of yours comes to visit, I feel as if that is when another chooses to leave us. Will it ever stop?”

  “Jane shall remain, I promise,” I said, brushing my lips across his knuckles.

  “Then that is comfort enough. I have lost one sister now, and I do not wish to lose the in-law one any time soon.”

  “You are such a contradiction, Fitzwilliam. For one who does not often possess the talent of conversing easily with strangers or making new friends, you are so bound by loyalty to those to whom become close.”

  He smiled down at me. “It is not so strange. I simply am different and therefore believe it easiest for me to keep my friends close and my enemies far away from me.”

  I chuckled gently, then looked out the window at Jason as he lifted Georgiana up and spun her around.

  “She looks happy, though."

  “S
he is,” I confirmed. “Be happy for her, my love. Georgiana has found not only a love, yet she has also found herself along the way.”

  Upon our friends’ return from town, Mr. Bingley, Miriam, and Caroline Bingley entered and we immediately availed them with the news. Miriam was overjoyed, Mr. Bingley was highly amused, and Caroline Bingley attempted a smile to hide her disgust.

  However, disgusted, she clearly was.

  Though coming from a good family, Mr. Whitfield was still a man of a profession from a long line of men who had professions, and though the occupation of an attorney was respectable enough, it still was not fully respectable enough for her tastes. It was apparent that she believed it below Georgiana to have engaged herself to a man who was anything less than a gentleman of no profession. And the addition that Jason was not only a civil servant, but also a street preacher and the younger son whose brother inherited the Whitfield Estate and lion-share of the wealth also did not escape her notice and keen observation. Thus, it could be said that she could not detach the man from the myth of what he should have been, and therefore thought him too far below our notice. As a result, she did not see that he was still on our level.

  And yet, as I every now and again spied her as we all sat there and listened to the happy couple express their joy, I believed that it was more than that. She may have been a very judgmental and offensive woman sometimes, yet she was never a stupid one. She had to have noticed that in every other circumstance, we were all finding ourselves, whereas she went from day to day still not knowing who she was and therefore filling herself with the words and standards of others. She was a woman who appeared happy and yet was not so. Therefore, it left me to conclude that another part of her might be jealous.

  Jealous that Georgiana was the one who came to New York and found love and purpose as well.

  Jealous that Lydia had come to Philadelphia and won Mr. Henry Darcy, when he was Caroline’s second plan after her first one failed.

  Jealous of Jane for being at Pemberley indefinitely and always in the company of high society who must admire her for her benevolence.

  Jealous of me for stealing her dream—even though it was never hers to have.

  Maybe it was not only spite that ruled Caroline Bingley's life, but envy.

  Therefore, as the evening wore on, Caroline offered her congratulations, yet had grown quieter as the night progressed, allowing everyone else to speak without her interruptions.

  Yet I was not blind to it.

  Georgiana's happiness ate away at her self-assurance and pride. Although both were two traits that I was not sure Caroline Bingley ever earned the right to have.

  “If I may,” Jason said as his carriage rolled up to the house, “might I come tomorrow and join your company for the day?”

  “I have no choice of course,” Henry Darcy said, “for if my honeymoon was meant to bring out the joy in another quarter, then who am I to get in the way of it?”

  “Then I thank you, Mr. Darcy, for allowing me the right to fall in love with your cousin while you and Mrs. Darcy here are on your honeymoon...and thank you as well, for letting me propose to her!”

  We all laughed at that, then Georgiana and Jason held hands briefly before he entered his carriage and it rolled down the lane and onto the road.

  “I am getting married,” Georgiana said, turning to us. “It is just...yes, I knew it, yet now that I say it to myself, only now does it feel real.” Georgiana then turned to Jane. “I did not even think that I would marry. I began to just wish to be like you—content with my purpose and no more.”

  “Oh, dear Georgiana,” Jane said with a sigh.

  “And yet now I have another...now I...” Georgiana's arms began to shake, and then she fell on the ground, holding herself. All the women in our company rushed to her to help her up as she laughed giddily, excited beyond words.

  She stopped laughing to say, “He actually was worried that I would say no? The fool! What would possess him to believe that I would deny him? What could he have thought otherwise? He said that he practically fainted when I gave him my answer. For it was the most important answer he would ever receive. Yes...the most important answer that I have ever given. The most important.”

  2

  ONE BENNET ON THE SIDE OF AMERICA AND THE REST ON THE ENGLISH

  The next day came, and it was the beginning of our preparations to depart. Mrs. Hale spent much time going to and fro’, making sure much of our items were packed away. When Jason arrived, before he would spend most of his time with Georgiana in Arruin's gardens, Mr. Darcy decided that was the best and only time to inform him of our soon departure back for England.

  “I feel badly for leaving Lydia and Henry Darcy alone like this to travel back to Philadelphia without us,” I said as I began to give Lucy orders of what she should pack first.

  “You need not worry,” Mr. Darcy said as he sat in the rocking chair in the corner. “When we all finally leave, they shall have a week here by themselves, which I am certain they are looking forward to. Let us be true to ourselves, my dear, we have quite intruded on their honeymoon enough. And they shall not travel to Philadelphia alone. Samantha and Mr. Eastbourne are planning on traveling with them as well, so that they may see their family again at Canterbury.”

  “Oh, Canterbury!” I exclaimed. “We shall not see Cousin Thomas or Emilia for years now. I shall miss them. And their other children as well.”

  “Yes, so will I,” he added. “Yes, I daresay that they have quite grown on me.”

  “As they would. Yet what of Jason? Did you tell him everything?”

  “I did indeed, and it is no trouble to him whatsoever.”

  “Fitzwilliam, dear, you must expand on what you mean.”

  “Oh, sorry. Georgiana had made him aware of our departure day a fortnight before now at the very least. This has given him time enough. He did not own a house but rented lodgings from a landlord in the heart of the city. Jason informed the landlord that he would no longer rent in a few weeks’ time. He can pack away his things swiftly and has already made plans to book passage with us.”

  “So, he is going back to England with us?”

  “Yes, he is. In hopes of being by Georgiana all the while, rather than allowing them to be separated for weeks.”

  “That could not have been better planned.”

  “Indeed, it could not. I must confess myself excited with how convenient it all has come about, with no strain on us at all. Peace is something I ask for much yet receive all too little.”

  “Oh, cease complaining,” I said, teasingly. “Our conflicts always lead to good and fruitful ends.”

  “I just wish there were others in our circle to fight them sometimes.”

  “You and me both, my dear.”

  “Oh, and I sent word to Pemberley and Mrs. Reynolds, at special request of Mr. Bingley.”

  “What could he need from Pemberley?”

  “I would like her to send out inquiries if there are any estates in the counties of Kent that are on the market and available for purchase. Bingley's time here in America with us has influenced him to quite make up his mind about giving up Aginfield.”

  “Oh, really?” I gasped. “He is really planning to do it.”

  “Yes, and he has already sent out notifications and posts in the newspapers that he wishes to release it. When he returns to London, he is hoping to have been met with a favorable offer.”

  “Then Mr. Bingley and Miriam will be close to us!”

  “Yes, they will.”

  “That will be wonderful, as long as Miss Bingley decides to often spend time with her sister Mrs. Hurst instead.”

  “One can only hope. However, I still wonder why she even requested to come to New York with us. There was no happiness for her here. What could she have meant by it?”

  “Oh,” I replied lightly, “she was hoping to make one of you fall in love with her.”

  “What?”

  “Yes,” I said evenly, “she was h
oping that one of you would fall in love with her and take her on as a mistress.”

  “Lizzy, you cannot be serious,” Darcy answered, frowning.

  “Well, I have no real proof that she wanted to be your mistress, yet I would not be surprised if so. For what else would be her desirable outcome for all her intentions? Yes, the Hursts had to away, yet she still could have returned to England and done any number of things. Oh, indeed I am quite serious on the matter. I watched her every now and again, my dear. It was quite clear that she stayed to make you in some way regret choosing me over her, or to make Henry Darcy regret Lydia. I believe she might have even felt satisfaction of making Colonel Fitzwilliam drawn in by her.”

  “You think so?”

  “Yes, call it vanity or pride, but to have seduced one of you would really have put a feather in her turban. Good lord, why does she wear those turbans? They look hideous.”

  “Why does any woman wear those turbans? They always look hideous.”

  “Fair point.”

  “And again, I could be in error on this subject, for I once believed myself to always see matters clearly, yet now I see that was hubris on my side. However, I do not believe so. She would look on you all with a desire to please you, charm you and therefore what could it all result in? Either she came to at least entice you and obtain an emotional victory, or to have one of you fall in love with her despite that you were unavailable, thus gaining a physical one.”